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Oh, I'm at a crossroads with myself; don't got no one else: 11.4.10

October, you trickster, you. The past month seemed normal enough. Summer gave up in a long, heavy hot breath of a sigh and then finally, it was fall. The trees changed gloriously. There was that killer full moon in the middle of the month. Halloween, fearful of being shortchanged by a Sunday date, really ended up with a full weekend of bewitching highjinks. And so I thought everything was pretty much the same as it always seemed for this, my favorite month.

But it wasn't really at all. It lulled me into a false sense of security. Because the minute the clock struck the end of Halloween night, it was the end of the usual as usual. E. is talking about going back west. M. quit his job and is holding out for something different. S. is sailing along in normal relationship stauts. C is in the throes of infatuation-imposed self-improvement. A. has a new grand plan of personal and professional self-renewal. She'll really do it too. B. posted that she was expecting twins...and so what that they ended up being of the puppy variety? It was enough of a shock to the system to make it on the list.

On the morning of Halloween (the morning of!), I walked into the neighborhood drug store and found that they had already done away with the orange and black decor and were stocking the shelves with snowmen and red velvet. It seems like change doesn't even give me a chance these days. I can't catch my breath, I can't get ahead of the plan, I can't catch up.

Which is why I am taking matters into my own hands now that we're approaching the usual 4 month stand-off with winter's doldrums and drag. I've got to get things going over here. And I know how it's done...

reflect - reinvent ....rayclaire@gmail.com... what i used to think... what i hear... what i see... where i'd like to be...

the black apple... the girl who... sarah brown... thunderpie... evany... jenny b harris... posie... claude le monde... artsy... fartsy... jeff... random person in texas... another rachel... smitten kitchen... more of me... still more of me... even more of me...and yet still more of me...more of me but not for free...

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