I�m a captain of industry, smoking famously, feet up on the windowsill: 6.24.04

Oh my. I have been remiss in not updating this thing in the least lately. But here are a few reasons why: You�ve all missed out on hearing about the night spent listening to mildly amusing childhood tales of amphibian crucifixion while taking in dreamy glances from the boy with blue eyes to drown in, only to find out that he is also most engaging in conversation. I didn�t mention how I came perilously close to actually GETTING PAID for what I went to graduhate skool for, but then didn�t afterall. Ah well. But I remembered how much I liked learning about it, which was also useful. I completely ignored the night I ended up slack-jawed and nursing a cheesewater and soda in front of the TV watching the AFI�s 100 Most Memorable Movie Music picks of all time. I know. But feed me a 10 second clip of Bette Midler singing from The Rose and I AM your viewing audience. This program totally killed me because it reminded me that I am a girl. Not a woman, no. A g-i-r-l who still loves the flouncy way Audrey Hepburn flops onto her bed with her fluffy pillow and billowy nightgown at the end of her little �I Could Have Daunced (sic) All Night� number in My Fair Lady. Come on, right?

Yes, this was a very enjoyable total waste of time except for one thing. Sadly, the AFI picked many of the wrong movies. Now they did get some right, for instance Shirley Bassey�s feral growl on �Goldfingah� (sic) is truly cinematic gold; �Moonriver� never fails to slay me; yet somehow they included �Shaft� (booyah, yeh!) while deigning to pay tribute that slarvy song from Titanic that makes me scratch chalkboards. Ook? Plus the listing was most decidedly skewed towards an over-representation of Barbara Streisand and/or Disney characters. I can never decide if I adore or despise Babs. And why so many selections from musicals? Obviously, movies that are BASED ON music will contain memorable musical numbers, no? REally, if that helps set the standard, then you�re kidding me�no mention of Purple Rain? Also odd was the fact that they included no original movie scores, just the use of other people�s music in movies. And there, what they didn�t catch are the real meta-weird scenes, like Madonna gettin� jiggy to her own hit, �Get Into the Groove,� in Desperately Seeking Susan. But, I did miss the beginning of the show, so maybe all this was somehow explained? Otherwise, I cannot account for the exclusion of the Star Wars theme, or at least Jaws, and I am deciding to overlook the big mistake of not recognizing the fine work of The Goblins in Susperia (duh). I am also very fond of Liquid Sky�s soundtrack. Anyhow, notable misses in my estimation were every single last song from Repo Man and also the first bars of �Rock N� Roll High School� in the selfsame flick.

Nor have you all been privy to the fact that I received two more writing rejections and my ego is about as shriveled and sucked dry as it might be. You have been unaware that I am ALMOST DONE with this stupid Moody phase and my pops loaded me up with excellent reads when I saw him last weekend. Most recently, you did not learn that a threesome invitation left me feeling totally cold and sexless. I have got to jumpstart ye olde sex drive somehow this summer. You don't know that I also have spent time with my favorite girl from SF and got reminded like a slap in the face how much I could actually, for reals, truly, no joke see myself drop this nonsense and get out there. I could do that, right?

See? Not updating is just like updating. You didn�t miss much.