old new guestbook dland GLINT

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GLINT


New Year, New Schmear. I’ve got problems of my own. First of all, don’t go see Paycheck. I thought John Woo could pull something decent out violence-wise at least, but le Affleck is so dim, so dorky the film flails in every scene. It is too unbelievable to cast him as some super smart engineer guy. The scenes where he was supposed to be inventing and thinking were hilarious—they really should’ve used a stunt double. Before that, I saw Cold Mountain in a movie theatre whose heating system was malfunctioning. Luckily it was one of those very high-class, super-dooper stadium seating, hoity-toity mall theatres and when everyone in the audience started to sweat it just smelled like a lot of damp money. But now I can say that movie got me really hot, which if it only starred Jude Law’s bottom lip, would have been quite true. Then, after it was over, everyone got a coupon for free soda from the management to make up for the inanity of the movie and how we had to sit through 2 hours of mostly Europeans in Europe and remember, Civil War, Civil War. Sadly, I am so cheap that the promise of the free concession lured me back to the selfsame theatre to view the Dick flick. And a concession it was, a cup of soda so tiny I can assure you that shots of HiC Orange Drink are very pleasant, indeed.

The other problem is that I’ve decided to buy a house. Now this brings up a host of other issues that I don’t care to touch upon at this juncture, namely why dc thinks it is so bling-bling hot shit and all.

Plus, why are all these Iowean debates hosted at such odd times? And they are no fun without Al Sharpton.


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